Thursday, September 20, 2007

the photographer

One Saturday night six ladies ventured to a lovely little dive called the Brooklyn Social. The bar that was happily populated with ratio of men to women being prob. 4 to 1. The first guy I met was absolutely adorable, he had blonde curly hair, a great smile, and one of those boys you assumed would be from Colorado or something.... until I found out that he was 21. ;( too bad for me... Sigh, no wonder he was so charming, he wasn't tainted by the dating scene of this crazy city.
Later I excuse myself and go to the bathroom. When I get out, I find out that every one of the ladies that I arrived with were connecting with a guy. Not wanting to step on anyone's "game" I sat at the bar and ordered a beer. I noticed a cute boy staring but neither one of us made that first move. So I sipped my lager, looked to my right: Ellie D chatting with an oh-so-hottie and to my left was a quiet, non-threatening looking male, (Sex In the City reference- He was definitely a Skipper.) But, I am not so hot either because no one is chatting it up with me, so I decide to just start a conversation for the sake of conversation.

I say: "hey, how are you doing?"
him: "Not good, I met this girl tonight and I really liked her but I don't think she liked me
much because she left"

I sigh.. because I immediately think "do I want to spend my night listening to this poor soul talk about his self esteem issues? not so much. "

The cute guy that never made the first move, smiled at me because he
A. heard the conversation and
B. prob. knew what was going through my mind because he then sits next to Skipper, talks to him for a minute then somehow we just start a conversation. Five minutes later, Skipper gets up and leaves. Thus begins my introduction to the photographer.

He is suprisingly my age (I always meet guys older for some reason). He was funny, complimentary, and so entertaining that we closed down the bar. He calls me on Monday and we decide to meet up on Wednesday to meet for drinks, possibly dinner. I am a little hesitant because I am not quite sure if he would be as cute as I though (never know with beer goggles) but as soon as I walk into the bar, I remember him instantly and smile because he is actually cuter then I remembered him! We instantly just get each other, laugh, smile, chat. I have to admit its been a while since that has actually happened.
It would honestly be perfect except there is on red flag. Kind of a major one. He just got out of a 6 year relationship about three months ago and he was staying in Brooklyn with a friend because his ex whom he lives with him is moving out in a month. ugh.
And so we discuss it, he is open about telling me about his ex and tells me they were fighting for the last two years (yaddy yadda.. )they finally break up and he is now just starting to meet new people. He isn't being sleezy about it but refreshingly very honest. He did say "I am not looking to get into a relationship (duh, obviously) but I think we really have a lot in common and I would love to get to know you but if you meet someone else, I totally would understand..."
So I know its good that he is being honest, and if I just wanted to have fun, he would be the perfect guy for that, but I actually do want a relationship and my fear is that what would I do if I really start liking him? I am definitely not going to be a rebound chick, hells no.

Later that night we go to another bar and play some pool. We are having a great time, laughing, smiling, chatting and eventually kiss (yum, great kisser btw). When the clock strikes twelve, we decide to call it a night and he walks me to my apartment. We have one of those super passionate five minute make out sessions and then eventually say our good-byes.

SO I need you opinions please. What do I do? Should I even bother seeing him again because there is no point, or do I keep going out with with him seeing no light at the end of the relationship tunnel......?

2 comments:

Unknown said...

Yes. I would continue seeing him. You already have your gaurds up--and he was upfront with you from the beginning, so you know what you're dealing with, and he also know what he can give right now, and it's his duty as a "dater" (just like any woman dater in his situation as well) to let any new potential suiters know whats between the lines. We can't control when we meet people. Just take it one day at a time, and see how it goes. If anything, maybe youll get to get some booty. But you already know going in it's not serious booty, and knowing that is half of the battle. He sounds really nice, and from my beer goggles, he certainly wasnt ugly. So i say get to know him and don't write him off!

Allison said...

I agree with Elli D - just enjoy him but keep in mind that you shouldn't get too serious about it. If you find yourself starting to have more serious feelings, tell him right away and see how he reacts.