(excerpted from my latest blog entry)
so i dove back into dating, first trying craigslist, then moving on to the much more satisfying and rewarding nerve, and after a few hiccups (the crazy, manipulative lawyer being more of a temporary coma than a hiccup, but whatevs), i found myself with a very full dance card.
this now leaves me in an interesting and not altogether unenviable predicament. i'm currently dating three men. one of these men is definitely leading the pack, and as is my wont i'm feeling like letting the others loose in order to devote all of my energy and hot-damn sexiness to the one main contender. but here's the rub: i've done that before, and found all of my farm-fresh eggs thrown into very unworthy baskets. beyond that, despite his clear interest in me, and what i took to be an intimation that he's not interested in either of us seeing other people, he's still up on nerve every night and just today has updated his profile a bit. so if he's all about the Lady, what's that aboot?
i'm trying to chill the eff out, not get paranoid, and not expect too much too soon (these are all unfortunate tendencies of mine, stemming from insecurities that despite 8 years on the couch still seem so hard to shake). i want to just have fun with him right now, and damn is he fun. the sex is amaze, we have an absurd amount in common (he's basically the male version of me), and he's been very attentive and gentlemanly in all the best ways - for goodnessakes, he's even talking about taking me on a weekend jaunt to chicago.
but i still feel like i should keep seeing the other two very worthy, handsome, smart, funny, and nice men, if only to keep myself from falling headfirst into something of which i'm still not super secure. i just don't want to feel like i'm using them or leading them on.
advice on this is more than welcome.
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3 comments:
I don't know what is worse when dating...holding the leash or having it around my neck. Lately I just don't carry or have one around at all.
I agree, this one is a toughy. My last real relationship was met through match.com, where I was smitten with him from the beginning and was dating two other people at that time. I broke it off eventually with the other two after he took down his profile and then the relationship was a very intense 5 months. However, when we broke up, he was back on match just 2 days later... needless to say I was crushed. That is the shitty thing about internet dating, we all so easily disposable.
If he is updating his profile, that is definitely a sign that he is still looking, talking to other people.... But, it doesn't mean he isn't super into you (you are an amazing woman btw), just means he's still curious to seeing other people.
If you like the other two dudes, then date them, but if you're just dating them to keep busy, then I say let them go and spend more time with your lady friends ;).
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